Let us all bemoan the suffering in the Hamptons. A moment of silence please. Then maybe take another moment and ponder the Oklahoma tornado carnage, the Syrian civil war, our soldiers and Marines bravely fighting the Taliban or perhaps the millions of Americans who still lack a living-wage job . . . OK minute over! Back to the “Snooki Alert!”

[“As Boozy Invaders Hit Beach, Hamptons Sound Snooki Alert, The New York Times, 5/25/2013]